You Can't Make It Up

Episodes

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  #204 Cow Patty Bingo

  5/21/2012

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  Duration: 20:26

  Victoria Day in Canada has us waxing nostalgic for the good old days when men were men and Prince Albert came in a can. This week’s show is loaded (watch your step). Bovine hijinks afoot to benefit a student kegger. Towns nobody calls home. Cats and Dogs 1, Rome 0. How NOT to hide evidence from the cops. Music for [...]

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  #203 Sweden Calling

  5/15/2012

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  Duration: 23:38

  Missed it by that much… Mom’s Day gifts for next year? Stupid.com has you covered when the ding bat who raised you finally fesses up that you’re … ADOPTED! Free love with benefits! Sweden offers the world’s 6th best quality of life, just ahead of Canada (US 12th). Best of all, if pilling up DUI’s is your [...]

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  #202 Los Perros de Mayo

  5/8/2012

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  Duration: 24:28

  Release the hounds… Hung over from May 5th and unable to afford air fare to Pamplona, we cheaped it out in Kansas City. Some PR flack thought THIS could help the city’s image? Are you dumber than…? While pulling a robbery, avoid saying “give me all your cash.” Unpredictable things happen. Kiss this! Meet 8 small time [...]

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  #201 Slow: Stupid at Work

  4/30/2012

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  Duration: 24:03

  Gray matters… Think the culture can’t possibly fry more brain cells online? You haven’t met Drinkify! Booze made for music. Need a sure-fire way to end a relationship quickly? Go hunting with Steve & Lisa. And his invisible hog. The critter nuts are coming! Bird brains versus cat crazies in Concord, Mass. More “Fun with English” and a stupid criminal trick. Enjoy [...]

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  #200 Anybody Can Do This, Right?

  4/24/2012

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  Duration: 35:22

  Three years and four months ago … We set out to prove that stupidity is the world’s richest resource. An endless, bottomless treasure trove of hilarity. 199 shows later we’re still shucking oysters and harvesting pearls of idiocy. Enjoy our Bicentennial edition! And keep the lunacy coming. Musical guest: Brooklyn singer/songwriter Lexie Roth. Linkage: TP dilemma? Oh, [...]

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  #199 Dang Revenuers

  4/11/2012

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  Duration: 22:58

  Tit for Tax Fake boobs. Free beer. Arsonist fee. Since the Boston Harbor social, people have tried to sneak the the wackiest deductions past the Tax Man. Some of ‘em worked! Are you smarter than an IRS examiner? Find out. Toilet trained… Where most tweets belong. When in Rome… And here you thought it impossible to ruin the decorum. [...]

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  #198 Pork. It’s what’s for Seder

  4/2/2012

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  Duration: 13:30

  Jewish cuisine is an oxymoron… Passover it on. Ah, Pesach. Eight days of pushing aside good tasting food and drink for … yuck! Keeping Kosher not your thing? Say it with us… Bacon! Oh, get over yourself. Nothing here is sacred. (see 12 Days of Dumb). Hey, c’mon back next week and we’ll wreck Easter [...]

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  #197 Marsh Madras

  3/27/2012

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  Duration: 27:32

  Greetings from the Bog … Grab a vodka cranberry and set a spell. What? You expected college hoops, babes and beer? Didn’t know spelling was required? Perfect! Our monthly Fun With English snafu is cued & ready to roll. Don’t worry. We’ll speak slowly. Just push the little PLAY button below (hint: it’s the only four letter word there so [...]

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  #196 Spring Break? FIX it!

  3/20/2012

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  Duration: 18:24

  Longer days and shorter shows… Mobile fans demanded it and we laughed listened. Cram this show in your iPhone-addicted ear. This week… a village idiot mayor in Italy tells residents it’s illegal to die… We found arguably the most insipid credit card fraud ever… more proof that local TV news should be blown up… and dumb and dumber get [...]

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  Herd Responsably

  3/17/2012

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  Duration: 3:12

  Now just imagine trying this with a CAT!

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  #195 Gene Pool Opens for Season

  3/12/2012

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  Duration: 27:51

  Self-serve… Frankly, we thought it was a tad early weather-wise to be cleansing the gene pool—but Gary Banning in North Carolina had other ideas. Yes, the season’s very first Darwin Award Nominee goes out in a blaze of glory with his first (and last) appearance on You Can’t Make It Up! Other stuff we didn’t make [...]

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  #194 Six Degrees of Johnny U.

  3/6/2012

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  Duration: 28:43

  Listen as we connect the stupidity dots to old #19, the great Johnny Unitas. No time for the radio show? Try our CliffNotes. 1] played at Louisville (Kentucky) 2] State’s tourism boss axed for botched PR job outsourced to the UK . 3] Video above? UK cable channel. 4] There’s this guy (from the UK) who married 19 women. Divorced once. Oops! [...]

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  #193 Leak Year

  2/28/2012

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  Duration: 25:51

  Let them eat cake… Our crack research staff, we call ‘em Team Stupid, stepped up to make our Fun With English edition a winner. Big thanks to Andi in Toronto for digging up that sign. Tempting to stock up on domestics, but then go explain THAT lot at the border. Kudos to T in Tennessee for tipping us [...]

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  #192 American Goulash

  2/22/2012

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  Duration: 31:43

  Seasoned to taste(less)… Naked thief (except for socks) tasered at Walmart.. TV news, doggie style .. Corn fed and bonkers for bacon (goooo Hawkeyes!).. App dating for  basement trolls (who’s on 3rd?) .. 3-wheelin’ drunken pianist. Magical mystery tour… Our guest band “Secret Skwirl”…? Ain’t their real name. It’s a real mystery and you can start gathering [...]

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  #191 Cupid here. Hot enough for ya?

  2/14/2012

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  Duration: 34:03

  Chemistry, chocolate, sausage and sewage … And if you’re not sick yet, toss in love and madness. It’s how we humans half-bake relationships hoping for happiness every Feb 14. Assuming you’re still aboard the Tilt-A-Whirl of romance, we found some bizarre, last-minute Valentine gift ideas certain to bring one of two results tonight. Nobody’s ever survived either of ‘em. [...]

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  #190 Woo Pig Sooie!

  2/7/2012

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  Duration: 26:33

  Cons 1, Cops 0 … Prison pranksters in Vermont might as well have yelled Sooie! State police cars there sport decals featuring the image of a pig. Only took officials four years to notice. BBQ anyone? Someone say pig? No matter HOW much you love BACON, we found something that could have you gagging on it. And no, [...]

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  #189 Law and Order Imbecile Intent

  1/31/2012

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  Duration: 28:53

  She ain’t called Jezebel for nothin We failed to get sued last time we tried, so we’ll try harder. Taking dead aim at a stupid LAWYER should work. Poor bastard thinks defamation of character applies to the Web. Hell hath no fury, dude! Other crap we didn’t make up… 104 yr old judge goes out blazing.. [...]

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  #188 Puppet Justice

  1/23/2012

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  Duration: 25:44

  Gas menagerie… Puppet court, and DC rats, oh my. This one’s for you, TSA (icing optional) Music from Meghan Cary includes title track to her upcoming album “Building This House.”

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  #187 Breakup Baggage

  1/16/2012

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  Duration: 24:55

  Angst for the memories… So your New Year’s resolution (fool) was to dump someone. What do you do with all their “stuff?” Helpful little anti-cupids that we are, there actually is an answer! Remember: we’re not responsible for the consequences. Think of us as the HMO of comedy. btw… some dump-ees share a big relationship [...]

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  #186 Anchors Away

  1/9/2012

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  Duration: 24:35

  Gearing up for sweeps month… Local TV news has never been more fun to rip. If you’re a Neilson Family, cover your ears because we take dead aim at a shrink wrapped news team in Nashville, and a station in Detroit that could drag us into their legal mess before nightfall. Is Denny Crane still [...]